Sony Balls (sic)

50 Short Stories Of 50 Words - No. 4

Anton Tries To Coin Phrases But Ultimately Ends Up Misunderstood And Alone.

Meeting with the sales team: “Well, I hope a snake ruins your happy picnic!” Talking to Greg from maintenance: “Give a chimp a gun and he’ll want a hat.” A first date with a friend of his brother’s wife: “Honey, you can’t see the parking lot from the changing room.”

Firewall Wank

Some of you work. Some of you work in offices. Some of those offices have a computer network security device called a ‘Firewall’. These Firewalls are designed by incredible minds to stop people wanking at their desks.

Being a helpful person a 'keen hobbyist' (I have a right arm like a San Franciscan gold-panner), I have figured out a way around the Firewalls.

Getty Images is an image bank where people buy photos to use in their margarine ads or for an NHS brochure they are designing and no Firewall in the world will stop you visiting this site..

So I did a search on Getty and attempted to have a wank using the first couple of images from each search. To keep things scientific, I used the same categories that you would see on youporn etc.

Okay… curtains drawn, shoelace tied round my balls, goose fat applied, dick in my hand… lets do this!

Hot Girl

Orgy

Teen

Latina

MILF

Amateur

Asian

Ebony

Oral

Anal

Girl On Girl

Sexy

So... that didn't work as well as expected... Back to 'looking' at your holiday snaps on Facebook then...

Where I Write A Reminder On The Back Of My Hand And Go Out Into The World For The Day Wearing It.